By Tope Babatope
There will be times when you will be criticized, sometimes justly and sometimes unjustly. The greatest people in the world have been criticized . Justified criticism can be very helpful and should be taken positively as feedback . Unjustified criticism is really a compliment in disguise. It is the average person who hates winners. When people are not successful and have nothing else to talk about they make you the target. The only way you will never be criticized is if you do nothing , say nothing or have nothing. You will end up being a big nothing.
An inability to accept constructive criticism is a sign of poor self- esteem . Let’s look at some of the suggestions for accepting criticism .
Take it in the right spirit. Deal with it graciously rather than grudgingly.
Evaluate it with an open mind, if it makes sense accept it, learn from it and implement it.
Don’t be defensive. Accept constructive criticism immediately and emphatically. Why? Because it disarms the other person. If we don’t it will irritate him even more and in future he will not give constructive criticism.
Thank the person who gives constructive criticism because he means well and has helped you.
A person with high self esteem accepts positive criticism and becomes better, not bitter.
The problem with most people is they would rather be ruined by false praise than culprit by constructive criticism .
In the absence of sufficient facts, people instinctively put a negative interpretation on others action or inactions. Some people suffer from “paranoia”: they think the world is out to get them. That is not true. By starting with positive assumptions, we have a better chance of building a pleasing personality resulting, in good relationships. For example, how often have we put through a call and not gotten a reply from the other party for two days and the first thought that comes to our mind is,”They never cared to return my call” or “They ignored me.” That is negative. May be they tried, but couldn’t get through, they left a message we didn’t get, they had an emergency , they never got the message. There could be many reasons. It is worth giving the benefit of doubt to the other person and starting on a positive note.
A philosopher once said, When l am wrong, make me easy to change, and when l am right, make me easy to live with.” This is a good philosophy to live by.
Some people live and learn while others live and never learn. Mistakes are to be learned from. The greatest mistake a person can make is to repeat it. Don’t assign blame and make excuses. Don’t dwell on it . When you realize your mistake, it is a good idea to accept responsibility for it and apologize . Don’t defend it. Why ? Acceptance disarms the other person.